How to Manage and Control Your Emotions in the New Normal

All of these emotions make us feel stressed and overwhelmed, but there are several activities we can do to mitigate their negative effects. Rather than focusing on individual coping strategies for each emotion, I’d like to propose five practical tips that can be used in any situation and will assist you in developing a new behavioral mindset. “Anyone can become angry – that is simple,” Aristotle said. “But being angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right reason, and in the right way is difficult.”

These simple insights below will help you lay down a solid foundation for managing your emotions and progressing forward with your team and yourself:

1. Investigate the situation. Instead of going on the defensive and attempting to defend or force your point of view, learn from the situation. Consider what is truly going on with that employee, coworker, or the entire team. What prompted them to act in this manner? How come they were so rude to your customers? How can you make them realize that such behavior is unacceptable? You won’t be able to change much unless you calm down and try to see things from their perspective.

“When you change someone’s point of view against their will, you’ve never truly changed them,” the old adage goes.

You lose the battle the moment you lose control and retaliate (even if you’re correct). Controlling your emotions and investigating the other person’s point of view, on the other hand, opens the door to a calm and enlightening discussion.

2. Label your emotions. Being emotionally honest is one of the qualities that will distinguish you as a true leader. If you are angry, frustrated, or confused, express your feelings. Even if the people to whom you express your feelings are those who irritate you. You make a more personal connection when you calmly share your emotions with those around you.

You don’t ever attack anyone. You simply talk about the situation that made you feel this way.

By displaying this side of yourself, you demonstrate your authenticity and vulnerability, which people appreciate in a leader. While making friends may not be your primary concern at work, opening yourself up to your team will help develop a sense of trust and loyalty towards you.

3. Stay in integrity with your values. Emotional control does not imply you sacrifice your values. Quite the contrary. When a difficult subject needs to be addressed, you will be fully capable of doing so… but in a calm manner. When the truth needs to be told, others will look to you. Showing others that you have integrity and stand by your values will help to define your reputation. Respect is always accorded to those whose “yes” is “yes” and whose “no” is “no”.

“Humility is the mother of all virtues, courage the father, integrity the child and wisdom the grandchild.” — Stephen Covey

4. Tactfully handle toxic negativity. It appears that regardless of the size or type of organization you work for, or how educated some people are, some have a very difficult time dealing with conflict and regulating their emotions at work. These are the ones that continually complain, create confrontations, and lack control of their emotions.

This is challenging for everyone involved, especially if the other person is your boss. Whatever your position is, you should not be afraid to speak up and tell them that everyone deserves to be treated with respect and courtesy. Know your boundaries and make them clear to those around you. Make a complaint if the toxic person crosses the line and becomes abusive or inappropriate in a professional setting.

You don’t have to become friends with everyone at work, but you can communicate and work without hurting anyone.

Whatever you do, don’t allow it to become personal. Accept the fact that you will not get along with everyone at work and that some will try to test your boundaries.

5. Proactively make plans for work breaks. Everyone benefits from a break. Whether it is a long weekend or a whole week, it is important to take a break from your job and routine to keep stress levels in check. It took me years to realize this, but by taking a much-needed break, I am not avoiding responsibility, but rather strengthening my resilience.

I strongly advise you to take a break every couple of months. Think of it as an investment in your personal development. You’re looking after yourself, so you can feel refreshed and restored and perform at your best.