How Emotional Maturity Can Help You Improve Your Communication Effectiveness
Have you ever wondered why some leaders appear more relaxed, less anxious, or less angry
when faced with adversity and uncertainty? How do they manage to embrace change, spot
opportunities in the midst of chaos, and effectively communicate with their teams?
Especially important for leaders and managers
Working with people and leading teams both necessitate a high level of emotional intelligence. The ability to recognize and manage one’s own emotions, as well as understand the emotions of others, is referred to as emotional intelligence (EQ). Emotional maturity, on the other hand, refers to how well you handle unexpected (and unpleasant) events that cause emotional distress and throw you off course. It is about understanding and managing your own emotions as well as understanding and managing the emotions of others. It is without a doubt one of the most important and respected characteristics of a leader.
You can live with uncertainty and ambiguity without becoming anxious or angry if you have emotional maturity. Instead of being afraid of conflict or avoiding change, you accept them as necessary and unavoidable parts of the leadership role. You embrace change and look for the opportunities that come with it.
People who are emotionally mature do not always agree with one another, but their disagreements are more civil, considerate, and solution-oriented than those who are emotionally immature. Emotionally immature conflicts frequently spiral out of control. Most of the time, both parties spend a lot of time arguing about who is correct and who is incorrect rather than working on a solution.
During a disagreement
Emotional maturity is essential
It’s the key to resolving issues without creating unnecessary drama. The good news is that if you are willing to learn and improve yourself, you can improve your emotional maturity. Being emotionally mature will benefit you not only professionally but also in your personal life. You will improve your communication skills and be able to lead with influence, compassion, and effectiveness. In this article, we will look at some of the traits that emotionally mature leaders exhibit when dealing with disagreements.
They Discuss Issues
They always find the courage to confront the elephant in the room, those unresolved issues that tend to fester into resentment, create distance over time, and harm relationships. They don't make assumptions. If they suspect something was not well understood, they will ask clarifying questions and take appropriate action.
They Cut to the Chase
Emotionally mature leaders do not waste time arguing over who is to blame. To some, they may appear impatient and abrupt, but nothing could be further from the truth. Their brain prioritizes solutions over emotions and individual opinions. They concentrate on solutions, gather facts over emotions, and present them calmly with compassion and understanding.
They Don’t Give the Silent Treatment
After a discussion, emotionally mature leaders may become quiet, but they will never use silence as a form of punishment. This type of behavior, also known as stonewalling, can be extremely harmful and is not typical of emotionally mature leaders. Stonewalling is a technique for avoiding confrontation by refusing to tell the other person how they feel or how to proceed. If someone refuses to let you talk to them, walk away and seek a mediator because they are emotionally immature and will use the silent treatment to obstruct your success.
They Are Forgiving
Emotionally mature leaders are forgiving. That is not to say they are weak or allow others to stumble, but because they speak up when there is a problem, they have no room to harbor grudges. They concentrate on finding solutions and developing positive relationships.
They Let Go of the Need to Always Be Right
The need to be right is a dangerous mindset that can ruin both your personal and professional life. Nobody wants to deal with someone who is always sure they are correct. A person who refuses to accept responsibility for their own flaws and failures adds a great deal of extra work to those around them. Emotionally mature leaders understand this and do not waste time determining who is correct and who is incorrect. They are well aware that sometimes both parties are correct, and sometimes both parties are incorrect.
They Apologize Quickly
Emotionally mature leaders apologize and hold themselves accountable as soon as they recognize their mistakes. This is not to say that they do not investigate the facts. On the contrary, they attempt to separate perception and opinion from actual facts. When they realize they were wrong based on accurate data, they accept responsibility for their actions and apologize.
They Are Approachable
Emotionally mature leaders are easy to communicate with. They don't shut the doors. They make you feel comfortable discussing anything with them. Of course, it's not always easy to bring up an issue that's been bothering you, especially if the emotional leader is your boss and you know you can talk to them. If you have a problem with an emotionally mature person, they will not ignore you or run away. They are not going to tell you that you are wrong or insane. They will consider what you are saying and have a conversation with you about it.
Emotionally mature leaders recognize their shortcomings
They are also aware of their triggers and work to overcome them so that they do not control them. They recognize that certain situations can get the best of them. They will apologize for their actions if this occurs. And make every effort not to repeat the behavior. However, one of the most noticeable characteristics is their compassion, even when things are difficult. If they disagree, they will never cast a blind eye at their colleagues or loved ones. They have compassion in their hearts even during conflicts. They can be firm, strict, and overly logical, but they are always kind.
For more information on how you can increase your emotional maturity, check out the
About the author:
Carole Nicolaides, MBA is the CEO of Progressive Leadership Inc. and has over 20 years business experience in the areas of organizational change management, organizational effectiveness, program management and leadership development. She held senior roles in the information technology, financial services, communications, government agencies and healthcare industries. Carole’s pragmatic, fluff-free and grounded perspective on leadership prepares management and their teams actively to lead the change. Contact us today to learn more about how you can create a culture that supports your changing initiatives.
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